Pardon the Dust

On where I’ve been the last four years and why I’ve returned to the newsletter now

Photo via Nappy.co

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Four years ago, I decided that I was going to move to South Korea.  It seemed like a good idea at the time (and now that I’m back in the States, I can say it was). The country successfully contained COVID-19, and I had a job opportunity providing housing and financial security, so why not? It appeared to be a perfect alternative to the uncertainties that 2020 America faced. So, in February 2021, I packed up my things and left. It was also during this time when life started to get hectic, and unfortunately, I had to pause the newsletter.

Believe me, I didn’t want to. Life abroad presented rich experiences, and the societal regress back home provided enough material to write about. But Lord knows I did not have the mental capacity to do so. My job took up the majority of my free time, and writing about “Black” issues just seemed both overwhelming and irrelevant during this time in my life. I no longer wanted to limit myself and what I wrote about, but I didn’t know where to start. But before I go on, let me return to a few years ago.

In May 2020, I started this newsletter in response to the pandemic and the protests against George Floyd’s murder. I was mainly influenced by Black people speaking up about the microaggressions they’ve experienced at the workplace, a situation that I’ve personally experienced. We were no longer whispering about our shared, dehumanizing experiences; they were all out in the open, and it was powerful. It was also an election year when progressive issues (such as increasing the minimum wage, decriminalizing marijuana, canceling student debt, and Medicare for all) were on the main stage. Also, let’s not forget that Trump lost. It appeared that 2020 was bringing about radical change. I was hopeful, maybe naive in retrospect, but yes, hopeful. 

Well, boy, was I wrong. America has experienced a significant backlash on many fronts in the last four years – an abrupt change that I was floored by during my time abroad. The rollback of civil rights and the demise of Roe vs. Wade,  the rise of authoritarian and racist rhetoric, the insurmountable suffering in Palestine, Congo, Haiti, Sudan, and Ukraine, and the million-plus Covid-related deaths and accompanying delusion that COVID is “over” has been jarring to see, especially in such a short period. In addition to witnessing societal horrors, I’ve experienced a lot of health issues and also lost many loved ones: family members, friends, and romantic partners. The enormous amount of change in such a short period knocked me on my butt, and I was honestly grieving for my community, family, and even my country. Though my grief was inferior to the amount of global suffering, I knew I needed time and space to mourn for the world and life I knew beforehand. Writing about that didn’t seem like an option at the time.

Back to 2024. After three years abroad, I’m back at home. It’s been six months, and I’ve had the time to process what has happened during the last four years with clarity. It’s also a perfect time for me to start writing again. As I return to Blaxplaining, I have more of an idea of where to go with this newsletter. Examining the nuances of Black contemporary life and current affairs is a broad topic, and I fear I don’t have all the tools to address it appropriately.  I can only speak on my experience as an individual Black-American woman and my place in the world. And that’s the experience that I want to share and write about. In the next few weeks, this is where Blaxplaining is heading. It’s taken me a minute to get here, but I’m excited to start writing again. Sorry for leaving you all in the dark, but thank you for sticking it out with me. As they say, pardon the dust, and be on the lookout for the following newsletter soon! 

x T.H.